just a small town girl.

"the best camera is the one you have with you."

hello, chase jarvis. welcome inspiration.

most of the time, i am elated to have my own business. to have a brand. to have people love what i do. but other times, i'm overwhelmed with defeat. a defeat that whispers in my ear, "you're not good enough. . .you aren't worth that money. . .you will never get to follow your true dream."

and lately, this defeat, this temptation to give up has been screaming in my ear, "you're never going to get to shoot a wedding. you'll be destined to senior portraits and families." and there's nothing wrong with senior portraits and families, but my dream - the ultimate culmination of my hopes and hard work - is to become a wedding photographer. i've studied it for two years because it speaks to me. i know what to shoot, how to shoot, where to shoot. i am captivated by a bride + groom and the love they share on this. . .their most special day.

so sometimes, the desire i have meets the despair that's creeping in on me. and i realize i have to rally. i have to look and see that i've created this - this - in two months. TWO MONTHS. and i've had over ten shoots in eight weeks. and i'm doing just fine. without being conceited, i am proud of myself. i have worked hard at creating a portfolio and a brand that uses all sorts of social media to market my business. and i'm not looking for pats on the back, but if i never get to talk about the not-so-great-days, what would separate those days from the extra-ordinary days?

so, now, side-note.

actually, i don't have another note. i was going to list everything that happened on my birthday, but i don't want to get too list-y. and i didn't want to seem like i was bragging.

let's just say i am blessed. majorly blessed. by my parents and my grandma and my boyfriend.

and this year pretty much tops the cake.

its funny how years sometimes just keep getting better and better. each year you think you're experiencing the cherry-on-top, when really you're only dabbling around with the sprinkles and whipped cream.

i really hope that analogy worked.

i am off because cucumbers + dip are calling my name.

xo.